What defines me?

I was trying to update my profile the other day and was struggling to describe myself. My first thought was to say "I'm a mum and a wife". But I thought, no! thats too boring. I must have an identity of my own??

But then I started thinking about it. What's the alternative?  We usually introduce ourselves by saying what we do - I'm a teacher, I'm a lawyer, I'm a truck driver.

So what would I say? I'm an internal communications adviser.  I'm a public servant. But that's not who I am. That's just the last job I had. Why should my employer define who I am?

No. I'm a mummy. I'm a wife. I'm a daughter, a daughter-in-law, a sister, a friend.

I choose to be defined by my relationships. By love.

What could be better than basing my identity on those I love?

But I haven't mentioned the most important relationship of all. I am a daughter of God.

Here's me with the whanau. They make me who I am!

Shock, horror, I showed too much

He he he, Mike was a little shocked yesterday when he saw yesterday's post about breastfeeding and spotted the obvious in the pic of Adele latching for the first time.

He was like "thats showing a bit much isn't it?" and I said "I put it in black and white!"

He he he.

Things I'm loving on Friday

Been a while since I did a 'things I'm loving' post...

Breastfeeding

I'm loving breastfeeding. It's such a great way to connect with my cherub.

My two favourite things are watching her little eyes roll back and her eyelids fall shut as she is overtaken by sleep. It seems to be such a peaceful way to fall asleep - I admit I'm a bit jealous.

The other favourite is when she's been sucking a while and then gets another let down. Suddenly she has to start swallowing regularly again and her eyes often widen as she concentrates hard. Ooh and I love hearing the milk swishing around in her mouth before she swallows it.

Can you tell I think about this a lot? I love the La Leche League principle "Mothering through breastfeeding is the most natural and effective way of understanding and satisfying the needs of the baby".

Here's us at the Hamilton Gardens.

And this is our very first breastfeed. She was so clever and breastcrawled and self latched within 10 minutes of birth! (BTW, breastcrawling is super cool - google it! Hmmm, maybe I'll blog about it sometime...)

Send a card

This is a cool service from NZ Post where you can go online, pick a card, upload your own photo, write a message and they'll post out a card to someone for you. I've done it a few times now. I took a photo of Adele holding a cardboard sign saying 'Happy Birthday Aunty Susan" and uploaded that as the front page of the card. Super cute! And a very handy service.

A note though - you do need to do it a good few days in advance. It takes a while for them to print and send.

API speaks

A fav website of mine at the mo is API Speaks. It's the blog for Attachment Parenting International. The say they are the voice for gengle parents everywhere.

A variety of writers contribute blogs and they offer interesting perspectives on parenting.

Wordless Wednesday - Tomatoes!

Creation a week #9

I've been awol for a few weeks. Not much sleep, holidays, sickness, busy-ness etc. But this creation I actually did over Easter! It's just taken me this long to get around to photographing and posting it. Adele is getting back in to the swing of things now (sleep-wise) so I'll hopefully have more time for blogging again :)

So here is the Easter bunny I made for Adele. It would have been really cool with a wee bell inside but I didn't have one - next time!

On the bookshelf...

At the mo I'm reading The Discipline Book by Dr William Sears and Martha Sears.

In many ways it's seems a bit early to be thinking about discipline with Adele but Marianne and I were having a conversation about discipline the other day so I thought I'd get a head start.

Plus, as soon as she started crawling I've noticed myself saying no, a-ah, not for Dellie a whole lot more!

Oh yes, and one day while boggling on the interwebby I stumbled across the concept of 'No punishment parenting'. Oh, no, I thought. Another crazy idea I'll latch on to to make my life more difficult for myself. (I'll never understand why I can't just do things the normal, easy way!)

So, The Discipline Book. I've read the first section which is about setting the environment for positive parenting. The Sears' say the the role of parents is to help the child feel right so that they will act right. Discipline is best if it is internally motivated rather than externally. So the kid should want to be good because it makes them feel good and makes their parents happy rather than behaving because they're scared of getting in trouble.

Some of their ideas include:

• understand where the child is developmentally - what are they capable/incapable of doing and understanding?
• create a 'yes' environment so that you don't need to say no all the time (baby-proofing etc)
• ensure good nutrition
• practice attachment parenting
• use alternatives to 'no'
• build self-esteem
• help your child to express themselves safely

One other cool thing they talk about is that the ultimate goal is not independence. It's interdependence. First is dependence, then independence then interdependence. The last stage is recognising that you could do something on your own but that you'll get a better outcome if you get others to help.

I'm just now moving on to the section titled "Correcting undesirable behaviour". Sounds fun...

More cuties!

Marianne and Joanna came over the other day. Joanna and Adele had a lovely time standing up all over the living room and Marianne and I enjoyed a catch up. 

Adele introduced Joanna to one of her favourite spots - the gate! And Joanna taught Adele how to stand up at the toy box and reach inside (no photos yet but Marianne took a few so hopefully I'll get them sometime).

Ever since, Adele has been having a wonderful time getting in to the toy box for herself. And she can now pull herself up just by putting hands on the wall. (Proud mummy smile.)